today is good so far. I am pretty calm, and I am not obsessing with thoughts of me dying and leaving Jim to raise 3 kids. Just preparing myself for all the stuff that might be said today during my appt. I am okay with a mastectomy. Only if I get new boobs immediately. I am not okay with being boobless. It is one thing I can not make myself be okay with. I am okay with chemo too. And the thought of being bald makes we want to scream but I will work with it. Please just don't let me wake up boobless. I asked my daughter last night what she would think if I cut all my hair off just like her brother Cameron. She said- that would not be good. I would laugh at you if you cut your hair off, just like I laughted at Cammy. LOL! I love her honesty.
4 hours.
I have already decided that if you loose your hair, so do I! Justin said I wouldn't do it, so that confirms that I'm doing it! LOL.
ReplyDeleteLosing your hair isn't that bad. It does grow back. And you might find, as I did, that you look sexy with very little hair. ;)
ReplyDeleteTara.
ReplyDeleteYou are a strong woman, and I am thinking of you and the family.
You'll look great bald. Get a head tattoo. I dunno.
Also, go skinny dipping if you get the chance. Take the girls out for a big farewell.
Tara, your way of learning all you can so as to feel control is GREAT! I applaud you silently every time you speak like a nurse or doctor. This is how I would be, were I in your situation.
ReplyDeleteGlad you are writing. You have a gift and an honesty, and now life has handed you the story.