I have been so busy the last month! I have been meaning to write but I just never seem to have the time, or if I do, I am too tired. Things are getting better! My radiation burns are gone, I have a tan square on my chest, but it looks pretty good! The bad news is that I do have lymphedema on my underarm area- it is called truncal lymphedema. I also have some really terrible cording in my right arm. It is caused by scar tissue and quite literally looks like a cord that starts under my arm and goes to my wrist. If I stretch out my arm, you can see the cord. It is really pretty gross. I have been seeing a massage therapist weekly, and also a lymphedema therapist a few times a week. The lymphedema is getting much better, and the cording is perhaps getting better- I am not sure about that yet. It is very frustrating to continue to have things go wrong. My energy levels are starting to get better, but I find I still tire quickly. I am ready to do normal things but my body is not as ready as my mind, apparently. In addition to the other issues that I have already mentioned, I still have terrible neuropathy in my feet, and really achey knees. The neuropathy is strange. It isn't numbness, it is pain- when I get up in the middle of the night or first thing in the morning, or even if I have my feet up and watch television for a while. Once I stand up the pain is so terrible. The way I can best describe it is that it feels like I am walking on shards of broken glass- that are on fire! Once I walk around for a bit it goes away, but every time I first get up, it is just terrible. My knees- well, they feel like 80 year old knees. Every time I get up or sit down. I am taking some arthritis medications but that is not helping. My massage therapist is trying to help me with my knees and feet also- I really hope it works! One other thing that I find frustrating is that I still have so many appointments. I have had 4 appointments this week, just for myself! It is so hard to know how long some appointments will take so some I have to just schedule one a day- but then my whole day is blown. I am really trying to make an effort to double up when I can. It makes the days with multiple appointments very rushed and stressful but it is worth it to get a day off!
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| This is not my arm because it is too hard to take a picture of myself like this- but basically that is what it looks like- a cord going right down the lenght of my arm. And if you think it looks uncomfortable, you would be right! |
Now on to hair. Let me just say that it really irks me when people say wow, your hair is really growing now, look at it, it's taking off! NO! it isn't! It is NOT taking off. These pictures are taken 4 MONTHS after chemo ended. not 4 weeks- 4 MONTHS! I have 1/4 inch of hair. That's it! I can not even brush it yet. Well, I can, and do occastionally- just to see if it makes a difference, but it doesn't even move my hair because it is still too short. I have been thinking of getting a Marines tshirt, to go with my marine haircut! Oh- except that it isn't a cut at all!!!! Okay, now that i have got my hair complaints out in the open, I will say that I am very glad to have hair finally, small as it might be. If it is a warm day outside, I don't even wear a hat anymore. It is so nice to be able to go out without covering my head! yeah!
Something funny happened today in the chemo room when I was there for my infusion. Usually I have people not recognise me because I don't have my long bright red hair. I understand it, but it really hurts my feelings every time it happens. However, today at chemo on of the nurses didn't recognise be because I DO have hair! hahahahaha! That was a really good feeling :) I always wonder how the nurses do such a good job remembering people. They look completely different from the first time they come in with hair, to the next time 3 weeks later- bald. It changes a persons look so much! I suppose normally they don't get to see many people when their hair starts actually growing back in because by then they stop coming to get chemo.
Tara,
ReplyDeleteHang in there. Try to have the lymphedema specialist teach you how to do Manual Lymph Drainage. You're going to need to know how to do it yourself. I'm still dealing with truncal lymphedema whenever things bounce around too much (or get squished, like at my mammogram yesterday). Massage will help some with the cording, but it probably won't go away. I still have to have my husband massage mine from time to time.
You're doing great, though!!! Stay strong.